Chapter 1: Understanding Happiness in Achievement

Have you ever pondered whether you would prefer to win a silver or bronze medal? This question might seem trivial, but it actually sheds light on a significant concept that can guide you toward greater satisfaction in life.

The concept of the "replication crisis" in psychology was once thought to be an isolated issue. This term describes the troubling reality that many scientific studies' findings cannot be duplicated by other researchers. As someone with a background in psychology, I found this revelation disheartening. Was my education in vain?

However, it turns out that this challenge is not unique to psychology; it spans various disciplines, including medicine, marketing, economics, and even the hard sciences, where reproducibility of results is often in question.

Yet, one fascinating area within psychology has consistently shown replicable findings: the emotional responses of Olympic medalists upon learning whether they have secured gold, silver, or bronze.

Naturally, gold medalists exude happiness, boasting, "I’m the best in the world!" On the other hand, bronze medalists also tend to feel significant joy. However, the silver medalists often display a range of emotions from disappointment to disdain.

“Really? You just won a silver medal at the Olympics!”

The Gap in Perspectives

What accounts for this surprising emotional divergence? Research indicates that these athletes engage in “counterfactual thinking,” wherein they compare their actual achievement to what might have occurred.

While individuals struggle to assess things in isolation, we excel at comparative evaluations. The variance in reactions between silver and bronze medalists can be attributed to their respective comparison groups.

Silver medalists focus on the slim margin that separates them from the gold medalist. They often lament that with just a few more milliseconds, they could have been champions, neglecting the fact that they triumphed over nearly every other competitor globally.

In contrast, bronze medalists reflect on the narrow gap between themselves and fourth place, realizing that just a fraction of time could have meant no medal at all. They appreciate all those they have outperformed to achieve their Olympic status.

Ultimately, your feelings about a situation are influenced by where you choose to direct your attention. Are you fixated on what you could have accomplished but didn’t? Or are you grateful for how far you’ve come and the many others you’ve surpassed?

This principle holds true not just for Olympic athletes but for all of us in our everyday lives.

Are you satisfied with your home, your career, your partner, your income, your community, your children, or even your pet? Such assessments are inherently relative rather than objective.

In this era, more individuals enjoy greater freedom, security, and material comforts than at any point in history. Billions who preceded you faced far more challenging circumstances, living lives that were often "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short." Yet here you are, fretting about slow internet speeds or the lack of content on Netflix.

The Role of Desires in Discontent

Have you considered how your own desires contribute to your unhappiness?

Realizing that many of the things you chase do little to enhance your long-term joy is vital. Seeking happiness by longing for things that won't ultimately satisfy you is not a path to success.

While it’s commendable to aim for gold, remember to acknowledge the accomplishments you’ve already made in your life and career. Reflect on how fortunate you are compared to countless others.

In short, cultivate gratitude for what you possess and avoid dwelling on what you lack.

Be well.

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An earlier version of this article was previously published in the ACC Docket, the global magazine for the Association of Corporate Counsel.