Navigating Self-Gaslighting: 4 Insightful Strategies for Change
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Chapter 1: Understanding Self-Gaslighting
In our journey through life, many of us tend to suppress our emotions. I, too, was once guilty of this behavior. My past involved stifling my feelings, leading to a cycle of self-harm. I was perceived as the "good girl" who never spoke up, but inside, I was struggling.
We often deceive ourselves in an attempt to shield from pain. Fear of others' actions and their harsh words can lead us to ignore our own truths and feelings. I personally faced this internal struggle, creating a reservoir of grief and hurt because I never revealed my struggles to those around me.
It's essential to acknowledge that everyone has their bad days; we all experience various seasons of life. Interestingly, gaslighting isn't inherently negative; it can serve as a catalyst for us to better understand our emotions and bodily responses. While it's normal to question ourselves occasionally, confiding in loved ones is crucial.
Below, I share some indicators of my own self-gaslighting and the methods I adopted to overcome it. Admittedly, I still sometimes find myself in this mental trap, but I now know how to navigate my emotions.
Section 1.1: Recognizing Sensitivity
One sign of self-gaslighting is feeling overly sensitive. In my past, I often found myself crying alone in my room, ashamed to show vulnerability. Society pressures us to appear strong, but even the toughest individuals crave comfort.
Psychology Today offers valuable insight: While you may feel "too sensitive," the people who care about you will accept and support your emotional journey. If someone disregards or belittles your feelings, they may be contributing to your self-gaslighting.
What You Can Do:
If you identify with this, start embracing your sensitivity. It's okay to express your emotions. You may be surprised to find understanding from others. Remember, it's perfectly acceptable for anyone, including boys, to cry.
Section 1.2: Trusting Your Instincts
When overwhelmed by stress, I often doubted my instincts. Difficult weeks at work would lead to excessive overthinking, causing me to question my own judgment. This self-doubt emerged in various situations, affecting my personal and professional life.
What You Can Do:
Begin by validating your feelings. Reflect on your core values and assess what's happening within you. Allow your thoughts to roam freely, fostering new connections and insights.
Chapter 2: Releasing Self-Blame
The first video explores the signs of self-gaslighting and encourages self-awareness.
In my past, I often blamed myself for the negative actions of others. I believed it was my responsibility to endure their mistreatment without confrontation. Additionally, I would internalize guilt when conflicts arose, erroneously believing I was the cause of my friends' misfortunes.
What You Can Do:
Recognize that your mind may be misleading you into believing you're at fault for every misstep. It's vital to stop overthinking and practice positive thinking. Communicate your feelings and consider meditation to soothe your mind.
The second video highlights ten signs of self-gaslighting, encouraging viewers to acknowledge their emotions.
Section 2.1: Embracing Your Feelings
I used to conceal my emotions to protect others or maintain harmony in my relationships. This avoidance only deepened my distrust of others, as I couldn't even accept my own feelings.
What You Can Do:
Engage in open conversations with others. Allowing your emotions to surface early can prevent them from building up and causing more significant issues later. Seek out trustworthy individuals to share your thoughts with, and don’t hesitate to document your feelings in a journal.
Expressing emotions can be challenging, but it becomes easier with time. Understand that there will come a moment when you can no longer handle your struggles alone, and reaching out for support becomes essential.
Offer your support to others; you may find that they need your help just as much as you need theirs. Join my email list for more insights and resources that can assist you on this journey.